When the Body Won’t Let Go.

Sometimes, tension isn’t asking for more pressure.

You can stretch it. Dig into it. Massage it over and over again. You can find the knot, work directly into it, and still feel it return.

And maybe the question isn’t always how do I get this muscle to release?

Maybe sometimes the question is:

What has my body learned that makes it feel like it needs to hold on?

Our bodies are constantly responding to the lives we live.

The shoulders that stay lifted when you’ve spent years bracing yourself. The jaw you don’t realize you’re clenching. The breath that stays high in your chest. The places that seem to tighten again no matter how much pressure is applied.

Not every tight muscle has an emotional story behind it. Posture, movement patterns, injuries, work, sleep, and everyday physical stress matter too.

But our nervous systems also learn from experience.

Sometimes the body becomes familiar with guarding. (which I know too well…) with anticipating, and holding itself together.

If i’ve learned anything throughout my time on the earth thus far. You cannot always force a guarded body into that softness.

More pressure only gives the body something else to brace against.

I think there’s something to learn from that outside of the massage room, too.

My therapist once told me:

“Be so okay with you that you’re okay with the next person.”

and I’ve carried that with me.

It’s empowering, and beautiful about becoming comfortable enough within yourself that you don’t constantly need to fight what is different from you or fight yourself into becoming someone different, either.

Know yourself without needing to defend yourself.

Accept yourself without believing you’re finished growing

Let another person be who they are without losing who you are in the process.

Maybe our bodies deserve some of that same grace.

Instead of approaching every tense place with How do I make this go away?, maybe we can become curious about it.

What do you need?

Maybe it needs pressure.

Maybe it needs movement.

Maybe it needs warmth.

Maybe it needs rest.

Maybe it just needs time.

As a massage therapist, I don’t believe my job is to force your body to release something it isn’t ready to release. Im not here to uncover memories or promise to remove trauma through touch.

However, what I can offer is a place where your body is allowed to be exactly where it is — Fully present, without judgement.

A place to listen before we try to change.

Being at home within ourselves, our bodies, our stories, our differences is a part of what allows us to hold space for somebody else to do the same.

BE SO OKAY WITH YOU THAT YOU’RE OKAY WITH THE NEXT PERSON.

That starts with becoming okay enough with your body to listen when it speaks instead of immediately asking it to be different.

Thanks for reading.

All the love Always,

Je’Dah x